Fear and Loathing South of the 40 : Not so Hip Hitler
Achtung! Cultural Misappropriation
Every once and awhile a story will come along and shock me due to the sheer absurdity of the situation. I was fortunate to find a few this week. A young woman named Sierra Holtz was shopping in a boutique on Mount-Royal Avenue when she came across a T-shirt that depicted Hitler sporting an afro, with a caption that read “Too fast to Live, Too young to Die” on it. Miss Holtz, being offended, approached the clerk in the store to enquire about the shirt. The clerk informed her that the shirts “sold well”. In fact, if you liked this one you could also get one of Hitler with a heart on his armband, or Hitler on the beach. There are quite a few things wrong with this whole scenario, so lets go with the very obvious, in what world does putting Hitler on a T-shirt seem like a good idea? Putting Hitler on a shirt could be poor judgement, ok, mistakes get made, but putting him on three different shirts? Biggest question of all, who the fuck is wearing the shirts?
Crime and Punishment
If you live in La Belle Province I am sure you remember Valerie Poulin Collins, aka the baby snatcher. She is the young woman who stole the 16 hour old baby from a hospital in Trois-Rivieres. Last week she was sentenced to 31 months in prison, with time served, that leaves her two years less a day. Every story I read about this is very cut and dry, like everything is ok, no big deal, justice had been served. Nowhere does it say how crazy this act is!! Shouldn’t the authorities be telling us about the treatment she is getting? People, she stole a baby not a cantaloupe, for Christ sakes. That’s really really NUTS!!
H20 with Bonus Minerals and ???
Here’s one from the “Are you kidding me” file. Some Pointe-Claire residents are complaining about their water having an orange hue to it. Some residents say they have noticed a rust colour in their water, the city says this is probably due to power fluctuations at the water plant and that the water is safe to drink. Now here is where it gets good. One resident who was interviewed, Jade Drury, says she had to let her taps run for an hour before the orange hue cleared. An hour? Did she just say she lets her taps run for an hour? But wait it’s not done. She goes on to say that they had to cancel Thanksgiving breakfast because they could not brew any coffee or wash any fruit. Holy shit, are you kidding me, I’ve dropped fruit on the floor in the Metro, picked it up, ate it, and guess what, I am still here to talk about it! I’ve dropped fruit on ground at bus stations and ate it. I dropped fruit at… ok ok, you get it. Just who was coming over for breakfast? The Queen?
Last Week at a Glance:
To Text and Drive or Not To Text and Drive
Just so you can’t say you weren’t warned, demerit points for texting while driving are going up from three to four points early next year. Quebec will be one of three provinces in Canada where you will lose four points, Saskatchewan and Newfoundland being the other two. My advice if you want to text and drive, move to Nova Scotia or Alberta, no fines and no demerit points, it’s pretty much a free for all.
Egregious Dentistry
A dentist in Ottawa has lost his license to practice. Khaled Hashem, the dentist in question, is not only banned from being a dentist, he could face criminal charges. Irwin Fefergrad, who’s been managing the Royal College of Dental Surgeons of Ontario licenses over the last 12 years says this is probably the most egregious cases he has ever seen (for those of you who do not know what egregious means, I looked it up. It means extraordinary in a bad way. What? who uses words like that?). Hashem’s magnum opus (there’s a word for you), cementing a human tooth in another human’s mouth! Holy Shit and pass the potato’s, that is crazy. At least someone investigated and got to the tooth of the matter (Come on, that’s a good one).
Take Us To Your Mayor
Well, if you didn’t catch it a couple of weeks ago we had a bonafide UFO sighting here in Montreal, caught on film! A TVA weather reporter was doing a live piece when over her shoulder a green ball of light streaked across the screen. Of course ‘The Man’ came out right away and tried to cover it up, saying it was a meteor. However, McGill expert, Pierre Hudon, has stated that it could not have been a meteor because when a meteor flies through the sky it lights up the entire sky. Put that in your pipe and smoke it nay-sayers, we have it on video.
The Last Word of the Week:
The last word this week is more of a comment on a photo. The story ran in the Huffington Post Canada with the caption, “Anti-Radiation Pills To Be Given To Ontario Residents Living Near Nuclear Power Plants” I am not going to go into the story as I think the headline sort of speaks for itself, go ahead and read the article for yourself if you’d like (‘specially if you live in Ontario and near a nuclear power plant). What I wanted to comment on was the photo that was with the story. There are three people, one grown woman and two children, in a body of water and right behind them is (what we are to assume) is this huge nuclear power plant. How does this strike someone as a good idea? “Sure is hot out kids, lets go for a swim, RIGHT NEXT TO THE NUCLEAR POWER PLANT”. I don’t know, I just don’t know.
Let Ken know what you think and if you’ve got any news he should know about, send an email at [email protected]