Rants of a Grumpy Old Man: Pierre Poilievre, The Silly Wabbit Who Wants to be PM

Pierre Poilievre is on his feet in Parliament: yelling, whining, and complaining, mad as a March Hare. Somehow appropriate, considering his name: “poi” means “pea” in French, and a “lievre” is a “hare,” in case you’ve ever wondered about the origin. Thus, “Pea-Hare,” but let’s shorten it to “Hare-brain” so that we are on the same page.

Canada’s own “Silly Wabbit,” while no Bugs Bunny, is locking horns with his own version of Elmer Fudd, PM Justin Trudeau, but now it is Pierre who is wielding the gun and hunting hat, somehow appropriate since he is a yahoo from Alberta.

Pierre is always oh-so-indignant: accusing the heinous Liberals of believing in Climate Change, of attempting to inject all Canadians with a secret Covid vaccine that makes them vote Liberal Red, something that makes him see red. In fact, Pierre joined the mad truckers in their march on Ottawa, a march that shut down the city until Trudeau finally got up the courage to bring in the army and arrest the shit disturbers. Pierre, meanwhile, screamed about the denial of freedom and of human rights, as those idiots wrecked havoc on the lives of Ottawa citizens while creating chaos and social unrest.

Now, I am no fan of Justin Trudeau and the Liberals, but I think they got that one right.

Here are two juicy tidbits from the Conservative Party Platform:

“The Conservative Party believes the government should consider reforming Canadian federalism, taking into account: i. the need to consolidate Quebec’s position within the Canadian federation due to the province not signing the Constitution Act, 1982; ii. the need to alleviate the alienation felt by the citizens of the West.”

What is really behind these poorly articulated statements? As for “i,” the “need to consolidate Quebec’s position…,” this is nothing more than a smokescreen to kiss Quebec’s ass for votes come the next election. All three of the political parties have been ridiculously soft on Quebec, kowtowing to anything it wants. The PC purports to be a federalist party, but it is federalism guaranteed to divide each province according to its own self-interests. This leads us to their point “ii,” the “alienation felt by the citizens of the West.” If he were the least bit honest, Poilievre would admit that (a) this is really double-speak for Alberta hating Quebec, having to give it large transfer payments that westerners think is unwarranted, and (b) the “alienation” he is talking about comes from any environmental policy that seeks to stop the production of oil from Alberta’s tar sands. As an MP from Calgary, Poilievre encourages a gas and oil economy and is desperately afraid of any type of control, climate change be damned. Let’s add a (c) to this: Alberta’s wet-dream is to separate from Canada and link up to the U.S., thinking that the rest of Canada has depended on its oil production to drive the economy for so long that the thought of shifting to a green economy is a serious crime, with a U.S alliance. being its “get out of jail” card.

Furthermore, the PC-s would like nothing more than for Trump to become President again. Poilievre has made his position absolutely clear by supporting the Far Right, trumpeting (Trump-petting?) God, family, and country above all else. Like Andrew Scheer before him, he wants to change the abortion laws (thus setting Women’s Rights back to the Dark Ages), stop the legal sale of marijuana, question the right to physician-assisted termination of life, and deny the rights of non-binary and transgender citizens, something that the Province of Alberta has already taken on as law.

All a shift toward the conservative Right that has already created such polarization south of the border from which democracy might never recover.

So, what’s next if he becomes our next PM? Trumpian autocracy? Canada with its own dictator, though ours would be more like the Charlie Chaplin movie?

Finally, the most serious accusation I can level at Monsieur Poilievre is that his nickname is “Skippy”! Really? Is that the best you can do? This is a monicker that maybe would fly in Australia, but surely not in the Great White North. We have no kangaroos here, and our peanut butter preference is “Jif” or “Peter Pan,” though the Conservative Party would probably work hard to eradicate that fey reference.

Like I have said, I am no fan of Justin Trudeau’s or the Liberals; they have failed Canadians miserably and will do anything to stay in power. I was an NDP activist during the glory days of Jack Layton, but “Angry Tom” Mulcair turned me off with his condescending rhetoric. Mr. Singh seems a decent enough sort, and his French is impressive, though I laughed out loud when he “announced” in Quebec that he “loved the language of Molière,” something that brought about a truly puzzled look from the debate moderator (yeah, for sure, Molière spoke joual…).

Yet, here we stand on the precipice of not only Trump becoming once again the “Leader of the Free World” (is that an oxymoron, or just a moron?) but of PM Poilievre, the avowed Anti-Everything that is Reformist and Socially Affirming, the first to invite Trump to visit our country as we stand by and collectively snooze our identity away.

“What’s up, Doc?” asks Bugs. “The PC leading in the polls,” is the sad reply.

And that’s all, folks.

Oh, Canada!