Fear and Loathing South of the 40 : Escape from London Ontario

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Not the Express Line

In the Montreal Gazette last week the AMT (Agence métropolitaine de transport) announced that it has learned from its past mistakes. This is the reason the new line, Train de l’Est, which will connect Mascouche and downtown Montreal, is over budget explained AMT chief executive Nicolas Girard. Let me put “over budget” in perspective for you. In 2006, when the new line was announced, it was to cost $300 million and open in 2009; it will now cost upward of $671 million and guess what, the old train ain’t chugging down the tracks yet. The reason for this colossal fuck up — Girard blames bad planning (you think?). Dear Readers, this story is close to my heart as for over a decade I rode the old rails to and from work. Let me tell you from past experiences, instead of making new lines, the AMT should concentrate on making the lines it already has work! Name of the game when riding the train: waiting (specially when it’s freeze your ass off cold)!

I Smell Dead People

For the first time in Quebec, a funeral director has had his permit revoked. The director of the Complexe Funeraire Fortin, in the small town of L’Épiphanie, was investigated by Quebec’s Consumer Protection Office. April 10th, Patrick Fortin’s permit was revoked by the Minister of Health and Social Services. He was found guilty of fraud. Then, in true governmental fashion, officials visited the funeral home, seven days later (yes, seven days). Know what they found? Nine bodies that were supposed to have been cremated but were left unattended by Mr. Fortin. Holy Sweet Jesus, have you any idea what nine unattended dead bodies must smell like after seven days? I, for one, do not, and hope to never, ever, find out, but the word Ripe comes to mind. Moral of the story, do not put off until tomorrow what you can do today, and Mr. Fortin, shame on you.

30 Reasons to Smile

Hot Damn the Food Trucks are back! 30 permits have been given out again this year to trucks that will serve food from 7am to 10:30pm in the Ville-Marie borough and along the Lachine Canal. 7 days a week. You can get a full list of what is what and where to find them in this article. Not everyone was happy about this though. Some vendors who had permits last year didn’t make the cut this summer. Louis-Pierre Charest, the owner of L’Assomoire Mobile, spent money sprucing up his truck for this season only to be told he would not be getting a permit. “What explains this?” asked Charest. “We don’t know.” The Quebec Street Food Association (we got an Association for just about everything, don’t we) said that vendors who were rejected this time might still be able to function during festivals and special events. I hope so, I love those trucks.

The Grinch of McHappy Day

Speaking of food, what is the deal with McHappy day? Oh, you know what it is because if you listen to the radio, watch television or talk to anybody in North America you have heard of McHappy Day. Each May 7th, you are invited to McDonalds to buy a Big Mac, Happy Meal so on and so on, and one dollar of what you buy will be given to a childrens charity. Don’t get me wrong, I want to help sick kids as much as the next person, I really do. I just don’t want to be guilted into doing it by a corporation that makes billions of dollars that day because they have marketing geniuses working for them. This isn’t Christmas or Easter. You can’t just make a holiday to suit your needs. I mean if you really want to make it a McHappy day then give all of the proceeds of the day to charity. Then I might go and buy a Big Mac. Until then, I ain’t lovin it. BTW, May 20th is MCKenny Day, please send a dollar HERE, thank you.

Last Week at a Glance:

Who let the skinheads out?

Just so everyone has this on their radar, in case you missed it. Last weekend there was a White Pride bash in London, Ontario held by the Southern Ontario Skinheads (SOS). Oh yes, it’s not just in the States. But not to worry, Jared Gilkes, the gentleman holding the party, assured everyone that, “It’s about pride in your heritage, not hate.” Whew, ok then, I feel better.

Dangerous City

If you have been following, a couple of weeks ago I told you about a recall on some medical marijuana out in BC called Purple Kush. Well there has been another recall. The company Clearview recalled a batch of pot called – K-Farms Lot: K1-KFM-001-14 (which is nowhere near as cool as Purple Kush) – for testing positive for bacteria outside the acceptable limits. Guess where Clearview is? In London Ontario. What the hell is going on over there? Actually maybe send some of the pot over to the skinheads and mellow them out a bit.

Wunderkid

Here is some good news for ya. Amilia Hildahl, an eleven year old Calgary girl, will be performing, solo, at Carnegie Hall on May 26th. Amilia has been playing the violin since about the age three and presently plays second violin with the Mount Royal University Orchestra. Here is what Amilia things about her good fortune “It’s a huge thing!” Damn straight it is, go get ‘em Amilia.

Last Word of the Week:

Guess who was back in the news last week, Monica Lewinsky. Now there is a blast from the past. She has written an article for Vanity Fair about the whole Bill Clinton thing. Apparently she is speaking out on behalf of victims of online humiliation. In her article she says “their affair was consensual and if there was any abuse involved, it came afterward, when Clinton’s inner circle tried to discredit her and the president’s opponents used her as a political pawn.” I never really got old Monica. What exactly did she think was gonna happen when she came out about the old ‘incident’? That everyone was gonna tap dance into the sunset singing When the Saints go Marching In. Personally I think Monica is probably once again in need of some cash.

Contact Ken Gaucher HERE.