Fear and Loathing South of the 40: Montreal’s Watergate

Work is long Work is long

I really do try not to use too much profanity here at Fear & Loathing. But sometimes you just have to use the appropriate words for the situation. Last week we learned of two colossal Fuck Ups of such epic proportions they had me standing in the kitchen in my underwear yelling “Sweet Jesus H. Christ, how can shit like that happen?” Maybe that is a bit too much info.

Number 1, Off Target


First off, it was announced that the retail store ‘Target’ will be leaving Canada. Yes, all 133 stores, leaving 17,600 Canadians out of work. There are a number of reasons cited for this happening but it all comes down to money (as it usually does). Target Corp. CEO Brian Cornell said “Simply put, we are losing money every day.” Apparently Target has lost an estimated $2.1 billion during the 22 months it has been in Canada. Ok I get this, I really do. No business is
going to stay open if it is losing money. But didn’t they look into this before they got the whole ball rolling? Didn’t they have a plan B? Didn’t someone, at this multi-billion dollar mega business think that opening 100 stores in Canada all at the same time might be risky? Really?

Number 2, Longueuil Watergate.

shit jump

shit jump

Last Wednesday at around 4 am, 28,000 liters of diesel spilled into the St-Lawrence due to a generator leak at a filtration plant in Longueuil. Right there, people should be like “What! How the fuck can that happen?” That should be someone’s ass right there, but wait it gets better. Not only does the City of Longueuil put off telling the province about the leak, it issues a statement telling people it’s ok to drink the water. By Thursday, after people are complaining their water smells like gas, the City runs some tests and finds diesel in the water people are giving to their kids. Then, only then, does the City issue advisory. Holy Shit in a handbag, I think anyone involved in this fiasco, from the Mayor on down, should not only lose their jobs but be forced to drink a liter of the swill they were telling residents was ‘ok’ to drink.

Francis Simard Dies

Former FLQ (Front de Liberation du Quebec) member and convicted murderer, Francis Simard, died last week. Simard was one of the 4 people convicted for the kidnapping and murder of Quebec Labor Minister, Pierre Laporte during the October Crisis in 1970. In May 1971 Simard was given a life sentence, then in 1982 he was paroled. So I guess when the judge sentenced him, they were talking about the life of a parakeet? Ah the justice system, you gotta love it.

Charter 2.0 Hits a New Low

Bernard Drainville, Parti Quebecois hopeful, has revealed his new and improved Charter of Values for Quebec, the Charter 2.0. He has said that the recent marches in the province in support of Charlie Hebdo proves how much Quebecers are in support of his Charter (funny I thought it was to support Charlie Hebdo, but what do I know). From what I have read of the new Charter it looks like the same 10 pounds of shit stuffed in a 5-pound bag. What really bugs me is the fact that someone would use an atrocity like what happened at Charlie Hebdo to further their own agenda. A new low even for Quebec politics.

Racism is Alive and Well in 2015?

While we are on the subject of racism, here is one that made me shake my head ’cause sometimes that’s all you can do. A group of Montreal artists have signed an open letter denouncing ‘Blackface’ in theater. Yes you read that right, and No the year is not 1945. The Theatre du Rideau Vert saw no problem in using a actor in ‘blackface’ to portray PK Subban in their annual year end production. Artistic Director for the theater, Denise Filiatrault, who is 83 and has been in the business for 60 year, was ‘shocked’ and ‘humiliated’ by the letter. She had this to say “There will not be anymore black characters, it’s over!” (she really said that, I didn’t make that up) Does she mean like everywhere, ever? Cause I am not sure how she is going to manage that.

Last Week at a Glance:

Paying too much for drinks

There is a class action suit being launched at the SAQ over what is being called ‘unfair price mark ups’. A Quebec City Lawyer, David Bourgoin, is alleging the Commission often sells its products at outrageous markups, sometimes up to 400%, are a violation of the Consumer Protection Act.

Back from Panama

Looks like Arthur Porter may be on his way back to Montreal to finally face the music. Radio-Canada reported last week that Panama and Canada have reached an agreement for the extradition of the former Mcgill University Health Center Director, former SNC-Lavalin Strong Man, and all around nice guy. No date has been set yet. There’s no place like home, right Mr. Porter?

Last Word of the Week:


Don’t worry, it was not all doom and gloom last week.
Last week, Jan. 12th to be exact, was the 14th annual ‘No Pants Subway Ride’. It’s pretty much exactly what it says it is. You ride the subway with no pants on. Over 50 cities took part in the annual affair this year including Montreal. I love the idea, but I am too big a baby, it is just so cold. If we do it in July, then I’m in.

About Ken Gaucher

Email Ken Gaucher at [email protected] More Posts