Did things get hot or what? Hot and sticky, good lord, last week was hotter and stickier than Chez Paris at 2 a.m. on a Saturday night (I know what you are thinking – Yyyyeeeewwww). As Montrealers we have a thing where when it gets really hot, we say to each other “Oh don’t complain, remember last winter?”, which I have never understood. Ya I remember last winter, it was cold and miserable, so what? How does that change the fact that it is so sticky I can’t wear underwear so every time I stand up it makes that sticky peeling sound (which can get embarrassing at work). Well enough about me for this week, let’s take a look at what we got.

Baby Powder Blues

Johnson & Johnson are being sued over its baby powder (Please say it ain’t so). There is a Canadian class action lawsuit alleging a link between the baby powder and ovarian cancer. Involved in the lawsuit are a number of women from Ontario and Quebec, as well as the estate of a Montreal woman. The company has recently lost two major lawsuits in the states, one for $55 million and one for $72 million to a woman who died of ovarian cancer after using Johnson & Johnson feminine hygienic products that contained the powder for an extended period of time. This really bugs me cause who hasn’t used Johnson & Johnson baby powder? I used it on my kids, and now you’re going to tell me it is linked to cancer? Shame on you Johnson & Johnson, shame on you! And all you ladies out there stop using this as a feminine hygiene product; it’s for babies bums, not yours.

Officer 728 — Justice Semi-Served

One of the big stories last week was the sentencing of officer 728, Stefanie Trudeau. Trudeau was given a one year suspended sentence and 60 hours of community service for the assault of Serge Lavoie in 2012. I must say that I am surprised that the officer got this heavy of a sentencing, I am not saying she didn’t deserve it, I am just saying that I am surprised she got it. I will also be honest with you, I’m on the fence about this one. Lets be honest here, she didn’t take out the old baton and beat the living crap out of Mr. Lavoie, she put him in a choke hold. Do you not think this type of thing goes on quite often? I dare say it does. I think that M. Trudeau’s biggest mistake was getting caught on camera spraying pepper spray on a crowd of protestors. It was at that moment her goose was cooked. In the end, she is no longer an active police officer, which is probably for the best. But while she is out doing her 60 hours of community work do you know who will be putting the bread and butter on her table? You guessed it, me and you, cause she is collecting a permanent disability pension from the police force.

One Way to Deal with It

The Journal de Montreal printed a story last week that was quite disturbing. Over the past year there have been nearly 1000 complaints lodged against doctors in the province of Quebec with misdiagnosis and sexual misconduct topping the list. Of that 1000 complaints guess what percentage have been brought before the disciplinary committee… wait for it… three percent. Let me break that down so we are all on the same page. There were almost 1000 people that took the time to lodge a complaint against a doctor due to something the doctor did to them. Out of that 1000 people, there were 30 that the Quebec College of Physicians deemed worthy to look at? Not hand out a disciplinary actions, but to look at. Really? According to the Journal only 31 doctors have been brought in front of the disciplinary committee since the beginning of 2015. This seems astounding to me. But do not fret because the president of the CMQ, Dr. Charles Bernard says there are several measures in place aside from disciplinary hearings, such as such as professional inspections (what the fuck does that even mean?) and the hours a doctor can work. So once again, let’s break this down. If a doctor receives a complaint against him or her stating they have engaged in sexual misconduct, they are told that they have to work fewer hours? For the love of God somebody please explain what is going on here ’cause I just don’t understand.

Showers, please

While we are on the subject of healthcare, there was a story that came out last week that literally made my stomach sick. A Quebec City man with multiple sclerosis has launched an online ‘Gofundme’ campaign in order to raise enough money to have three showers a week. Forty three year old Francois Marcotte, resides in a government funded long-term care home in Quebec City. Due to his condition, he is in a wheelchair and has limited mobility. At the present moment, in the facility he is in, Mr. Marcotte receives one shower per week. “I find it humiliating. I suffer in the heat. Each morning I wake up, and I’m hot. I’m sweating. I’d like more than one shower a week,” Marcotte said. Oh Mr. Marcotte, it’s more than humiliating, it is inhumane. Quebec Health Minister, Gaetan Barrette, said the situation is ‘unjustifiable’, but has not offered any funding to change the situation as of yet (how many showers do you think Dr. Barrette takes a week?). I just don’t get it people. In a society where we spend millions upon millions to do studies on what is the best time to cross the street during the day, how can something like this exist? I will bet you dollars to doughnuts that Francois Marcotte is not the only person receiving one shower a week.

The Round Up:

Last week Vancouver police were called to a scene in which a car was engulfed in flames. When the police arrived they were confronted with a man wielding a knife, shots were fired and the man was arrested. Here is where it gets good. A crow swooped down and took off with the knife! HA, love it. Apparently this crow is pretty notorious in the area and has its own facebook page. BTW, the knife was recovered by police.

Kevin Vickers, the Canadian ambassador to Ireland, also known for being the person who thwarted a gunman on Parliament Hill two years ago, is back in the news for tackling a protester, Brian Murphy, at a Dublin Ceremony last week. I saw the footage. It is less of a tackle than a really angry tango but still, Vickers, you kick ass! Go Canada.

Last Thursday new measures went into place effectively banning smoking on outside terrasses (I guess that is ‘patios’ for the rest of Canada) in the city, near schools and playgrounds and in cars if there is a person of less than 16 years of age. Hey as a former smoker, I feel for smokers. Let’s tie a big red bow on their heads and punch them whenever they pass us. Listen up people, today it’s smoking, tomorrow it can be junk food, alcohol, pot, whatever, it is a slippery slope. Just saying.

The Capper:

I swear to God I did not make this up, this is a real thing. A man in Thailand is recovering in the hospital after a big-ass python, 10 foot, latched it’s fangs onto his penis as he was using the toilet (holy shit I am feeling faint just writing this). It was reported that the man, his wife and a neighbor struggled with the snake for 30 minutes and were able to pry (oh my good lord) the snake’s jaws open. I do not know about you, but for this guy going to the bathroom will never be the same.

Keep your heads down and whatever you do, look in the toilet before you go, see you again next week.

Give Ken a shout in the comments below. He may shout back.